Anima I remember it like my name
You stepped into my life
Just stepped in
And changed gravity
Your lips moved through introductions
But the buzzing in my brain
Kept your name a secret
There were no flowers to give you
So I shook your hand instead
Perhaps a moment too long
And the world disappeared
What passed for a floor was now air
Which I could no more walk upon
Than breathe
What passed for my life was now a wound
Which required you
In time you came to love me
With flames that would consume most men
And like the phoenix I was reborn
Each time in your arms
You breathed for me
I loved you desperately from within
The cage that held my heart
As I groped madly for the key
But a malady of faith kept my
Fingers curled tightly around iron bars
Cold and unforgiving
But love like this knows no end
And my flesh burns still
Though without you to cool me
And my heart asks why
Rhetorically
By dennis tkon copyright 2006
24 comments:
I love the whole poem-such emotion. And some of the phrases in particular reach out and grab me; changed gravity, shook your hand instead of flowers is great imagery, and most of all a cage around your heart. No matter how many times I read or write about this it hits home. Wonderful work!
I enjoyed every stanza, Dennis. My own memory triggered, the Animus, the one I could taste, but never possess through the other.
"What passed for my life was now a wound
Which required you"
That's exactly what it felt like...
Thanks for sharing!
--Robin
Beautiful my friend. We both have been there before. Powerful, "a love like this will never end"
And it wont
-bd
Wow. A moment that became a life. A caged heart.
Very raw and real and pure emotion distilled in poetry.
As you know my friend I loved your poem and I thank you for stopping to comment on mine. Thanks much
love-bd
You stepped in and changed gravity. Oh absolutely. Beuatiful poem.
Hmmm, I think i recognise this poem. It seems to have got better as i've read it again. This really is a beautiful piece of work Dennis.
The wound line is one of the best. The world needs more men who share their wounds and their emotions with others. Good stuff. BB
WOW. That's stunning. I can especially relate to the stanza:
"What passed for my life was now a wound
Which required you"
Great stuff.
Oh Dennis, this stanza is so...good:
"What passed for a floor was now air
Which I could no more walk upon
Than breathe
What passed for my life was now a wound
Which required you"
I love that.
Dennis,
From begining trough final stanza you led me along waiting eagerly for the next line. Pure heartfelt emotion comes forward and flls me up. Well crafted.
Thanks for taking time to look under the microscope and comment!
rel
I wish I had written this poem.
I wish I could write something as fierce and electric as this.
Powerful and honest and longing. Wow.
Dennis..thank you so very much for your comment..your words..warm and soothing. This poem ..wow you have put words to the most raw, intimate and bittersweet experience I feel our hearts will ever have in the pursuit of our perfect love..whether it is or not...and I completly agree with the last stanza..the part that we still hold near, even if we tell ourselves we have moved on, the always unanswered hope..if only...thanks again my friend..m
Thank you everyone who stopped by again this week with your kind words and creative thoughts. I hope everyone is enjoying the holidays. I know it’s a hard time for a lot of people. So to all of you and especially those who struggle at this time, I wish you all the most heartfelt love and an abundance of forgiveness!!
Love, Dennis ~
Ah, love...
Nice job containing this boundless feeling that is always hard to write about.
What a powerful treatment of experiences which obviously border on being utterly inexpressible. You have some great descriptions of just how one relationship can turn reality on its ear. Great poem!
Dennis, once again have a wonderful holiday
love-bd
I really really love your opening line. It pulled me right in.
I also love the actions in this poem: the moving through introductions, curling fingers, walking on air. I especially loved that walking on air part... its instablity, its insecurity, but also its freedom.
Beautiful.
P.S. During my first read, I read the word "changed" on the fourth line as "charged." It gave the poem this unexpected oddness, and I definitely do not suggest changing it because part of the wonder of the poem was that experience of stumbling on a word. I wonder if anyone else did the same thing.
Great opening stanza Dennis. Really strong way to begin. In the context of the whole work -- "You breathed for me" -- used as a solitary line is very effective. Nice choice. I enjoyed the poem. Thanks for posting it.
Thanks Sam. Most appreciated!
This is amazing. Very poignant.
Esp. liked "changed gravity," "what passed for a floor was now air," "cage that held my heart"
Oh, how i love this poem. The first stanza sucked me in, it's a tie for favorite between that and the fourth. it's a poem I think I could read over and over again.
Thanks for stopping by my page and showing love. I hope to read much more of your work. Anima is beautiful.
You have no idea how much this poem has touched me
It describes the totality of who I have been for years
I'm speechless
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